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Lack of friends in college.

Mental health awareness has been something relatively new, but has helped so many people around the country and the world incredibly, for me, I've always struggled with Borderline Personality Disorder, as long as I can remember, which in my own case it  means that my emotions take control of everything when they get triggered in a negative/positive way (mostly negative) And this has made me act in some ways in the past that always seem to make people detract from me, unfortunately.

For somebody who adores people and social interaction, losing friends and not regaining relationships with my classmates in College has always been one of my biggest regrets and wishes at school, I went through a horribly hard time on Second and First semester which made me act in really toxic and immature ways, which ruined my reputation in the classroom for most people in it. Fortunately, I made friends with those who weren't in the loop of the situation, or those who were repeating subjects, in order to redeem myself. It seems that at the end of the day, it was my impulsive actions (caused by my emotional disorder) mixed with the awful time I was going through, that made these people back away from me, and I never, ever knew how to gain them back.

I never blame others for my lack of friends, as it has been something I've struggled with my entire life, keeping a friend is the hardest thing for me, as I always get my ups and downs emotionally that make me distance myself out of nowhere, which just makes others think that I don't care about them.

The sad thing is, I've never ever in my entire life have been happy with how little people talk to me or notice me, in fact, I find myself day-dreaming of having friends in class to go out and party with.

I am in love with social interaction, I love speaking activities in English class, and just every single chance of interacting with others fills me with joy, It may be a little too late to start fresh with most people in my class.

But it's never too late to always improve myself and be a better person, and take care of my disorder day by day.
DonnyxBecks – No friends Just Family Lyrics | Genius Lyrics

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